Here I go...

Time and again, I begin a blog with the thoughts: This ... this time I'll do it. This time.. this is it. It'll be my therapy. My quiet place. My refuge. My place of venting, of tearing people apart ... without actually tearing them apart. Yet..time and again, life overwhelms me like an out of control bougainvillea overtaking an old Spanish house.

Let's begin again with a refreshing rendition of an overly edited AA greeting.

Hi, I'm Jessica. I have 3 kids, a boyfriend who is 13,000 miles away, and ex husband who is not. Mom and Dad live over 3 hrs away. Friends are even more rare. Good friends are truly hard to find.

I became a single mom, and a divorcee all in one foul swoop. Oct. 2008 was the day that it was finalized. There have been so very many changes in my life. But most importantly is the strength that I've been blessed with. Through the support of my mom, my dad, my boyfriend, and a verrrry small handful of friends.

Last month I was in the middle of a rough string of working 13 days in a row, or some such madness. It was a Saturday night that I had closed the store, flew home, showered, and attempted to sleep a mere 5 hours before having to get my happy butt up and back to work by 6:30 the next morning.

I woke up that morning with some dull pain in my lower abdomen...right around my left ovary. Figured that I was ... ahem...you know. An hour into my shift, and I was doubled over in pain. Which..was weird. Not like me. I was sent home from work, seeing as I couldn't stand up and what not.

After four hours curled up and writhing in pain I finally called the aforementioned ex husband, and asked him to take me to the ER. He drove me, and dropped me off at the double doors.

I found out that I had four very large Fibroid Tumors on my uterus. I was also informed that I had to have a hysterectomy.

Thus the birth of this blog.

Ironic, eh?